1 October 1999
Iago: Hey Zazu, whatcha doing?
Zazu: I'm reading a book.
Iago: Oooh, I've heard of those! I didn't know they still made them. Is it any good?
Zazu: Iago, great books -- and great writers -- will always be with us.
Iago: Oh? So now you're a "great writer?"
Zazu: <ahem> That's not for me to say, but the author of this book certainly is.
Iago: I have this feathery feeling you're about to tell me more than I want to know about that book, aren't you?
Zazu: Thats my job -- I'm good at it. The book is "Zen in the Art of Writing."
Iago: You can use martial arts to write? Hey this could actually be good!
Zazu: It's much better than good, it's a collection of essays on writing by Ray Bradbury.
Iago: Odd....
Zazu: What's odd?
Iago: I was almost certain you were going to use that book as a lead-in to another "Attraction of the Week" post, but what's Zen and Ray Bradbury got to do with Disney World?
Zazu: Quite a bit, actually. Bradbury was a major consultant on one of Disney's most renowned attractions, drafting the main story line and....
Iago: No! Don't tell me, let me guess! I know a lot more about Ray Bradbury's work than you think.
Zazu: That wouldn't take very much. But never let it be said that Zazu wasn't fair -- tell you what, why don't you try to guess which attraction Bradbury worked on while I tell our readers about Spaceship Earth, since today will mark the sixteenth anniversary of its opening?
Iago: Isn't that the ride they almost named "Honey I Blew Up the Golf Ball"? Go ahead. I'll tell them that Bradbury's book Golden Apples of the Sun was used for the storyline of The Land pavilion, right?
Zazu: This could take a while, folks, so let me tell you about the world's largest geosphere, and the attraction it houses. Like the Magic Kingdom's castle, the Disney-MGM Studio's Chinese Theater, and Animal Kingdom's Tree of Life, every Disney park has its symbolic icon, or "wienie", as it's called.
Iago: Can we say the word wienie?
Zazu: If the word was good enough for Walt....
Iago: Good point!
Zazu: Epcot -- or "EPCOT Center" as it was first known -- is no exception, and Spaceship Earth is that wienie.
Iago: Now I remember! Something Wicked This Way Comes inspired the Maelstrom!
Zazu: Please forgive my long-toothed friend. It's only natural to be unread when one can't read. Standing 168 feet in diameter (that's 51.2 meters, for you readers in civilized countries), it stands on six legs whose foundations go just as deep into the earth. Clearing the ground by 18 feet (5.5 meters), it's as tall as an 18-story building. Its shape and texture remind some of a giant golf ball, and Disney tour guides often mention that it would take a giant over a mile tall to take a swing at it.
Iago: Let's hope Paul Bunyan doesn't come by and start Driving Blind! He could knock out the space shuttle with a five iron!
Zazu: Speaking of iron, did I mention that the structure took over 1,700 tons of steel for its frame?
Iago: If it's steel, why hasn't it rusted?
Zazu: Only the framework is steel. The outside is covered with panels made from a composite sandwich of anodized aluminum and polyethylene called Alucobond®. It's self-cleaning, and that's what gives the structure its silvery sheen.
Iago: That reminds me, was it Bradbury's The Silver Locusts that inspired Kristos?
Zazu: No, but speaking of creatures from space, there is over 2 million cubic feet of space (57,000 cubic meters) inside Spaceship Earth. That space is used to tell the story of the history of communication, from the grunts of cavemen, to writing, to telegraph, to electronic computer networks -- stopping just short of the chicken scratches of my feather-headed colleague.
Iago: I got it! Dandelion Wine inspired Epcot to serve alcohol, right?
Zazu: Oh, go soak your silly head. <ahem> The outside of Spaceship Earth is every bit as remarkable. There are actually two geospheres, the outer about two feet larger away from the inner to permit easier construction and more accurate placement of the exterior panels. And there are a lot of them! 11,324 triangular panels were made into 954 larger subassemblies for attachment. I was particulary impressed by the internal sytem of rain gutters that channel water away so there isn't a shower around the perimiter.
Iago: Yeah, that would be like The Day It Rained Forever.
Zazu: Exactly. The Omnimover ride system inside is also pretty remarkable, as your "time capsule" will rise and fall over 100 feet as you pass through the fifteen minute ride.
Iago: Yeah, it's a regular Dark Carnival in there!
Zazu: Yes, and the lines outside can become quite a carnival in the mornings, as well. For some reason, everyone seems to want to ride this attraction first thing in the morning, creating long lines, while it's generally a walk-on from noon to closing.
Iago: I know, that line reminds me of The Bridge of Forever -- especially when the tour groups line up To Sing Strange Songs! That's why The Anthem Sprinters run for it as soon as the rope drops.
Zazu: <stares at Iago> You're enjoying this, aren't you?
Iago: <shrugs> It's a job. Somebody's got to do it, it may as well give me A Medicine for Melancholy.
Zazu: Keep it up and I'll have A Memory for Murder. Now where was I?
Iago: You were telling us about Forever and Earth.
Zazu: So I was. Among the icons of eternity that were carefully reproduced inside are a Gutenberg Bible, Michelangelo's Sistine Chapel ceiling (with artfully located scaffolding), even authentic graffiti copied from the walls of Pompeii.
Iago: I know that Pompeii is my cue to make a joke about Fahrenheit 451, but I can't think of one just now.
Zazu: Thank goodness for small favors. The words spoken by the Greek actors are from a play by Aeschylus, the words of the Pharaoh are a letter preserved on an ancient Egyptian papyrus, and the paper being hawked by the newsboy is an authentic reproduction -- though printed on Mylar for durability.
Iago: Could we speed this up please? At this rate you'll be talking until Tomorrow Midnight.
Zazu: Even the exterior of Spaceship Earth gets into the show. After the nightly IllumiNations is over, the lasers are used to convert it into a gigantic projection screen.
Iago: Yeah, kind of a Pillar of Fire effect. Nice.
Zazu: Oh, you've stayed late at Epcot, have you?
Iago: Yup! Sometimes I stay until Long After Midnight.
Zazu: Ah, so that was you doing the imitation of The Fog Horn last Saturday then.
Iago: It's the only time I can get to those game machines in Innoventions. I just love 'em! They are truly The Machines of Joy!
Zazu: Speaking of malfunctioning equipment, there is one major boo-boo on the attraction. In the scenes where the two children are using near-future videophones to share their sports victories, one of the projections is backwards, just like some parrots I could name.
Iago: One last guess. Did Bradbury's book The Dragon inspire Figment in the Journey Into Imagination?
Zazu: Like Disney's Tomorrowlands, it takes a lot of work to keep ahead of the future, and twice this attraction has received major rehabs to replace predictions that have come true. Today, the narrator is Jeremy Irons, who replaced the original, and my personal favorite, Walter Cronkite, a few years ago.
Iago: Yeah, but where did they get all those great ideas for the scenes in this attraction? It must have taken a team of Twice Twenty-Two geniuses!
Zazu: Just one, actually. Oh, there was lots of input from researchers at the Smithsonian Institution, the Huntington Library, the University of Southern California, and the University of Chicago, but the basic concept and inspiration came from ...
Iago: I get this funny feeling I'm about to feel very stupid.
Zazu: ... Ray Bradbury.
Iago: I knew it! That was gonna be my next guess. Oh well, wanna go over to Pleasure Island after the park closes? I'm going to go watch Alec Tronic and S.I.R. in their new show there.
Zazu: They have a new show? What's it called?
Iago: I Sing the Body Electric!
The music chosen to accompany this page is the theme from "Red Dwarf".