Iago: Hey Zazu, lately I've been thinking about shrinkage.
Zazu: Iago, I really don't want to hear th --
Iago: No, no, I've been thinking about Disney attractions where you get shrunk. I know about Honey, I Shrunk The Audience and Body Wars, and I seem to remember an old attraction at Disneyland where you got shrunk.
Zazu: Yes, that was Adventure Thru Inner Space.
Iago: That's right! I can't remember all the details, though. Maybe you could fill me in on the technical stuff.
Zazu: My dear Iago, it sounds like you are finally getting some sense. To learn about the Monsanto's Adventure Thru Inner Space by asking someone who has actually been there is much wiser than your usual behavior.
Iago: "Wiser"? You mean like in Budweiser?
Zazu: I didn't think so.
Ahem. The Monsanto Company, tiring of their sponsorship of the House of the Future, appealed to the Imagineers for something more dramatic than plastic toilets and microwaves, and their original plans for "Adventures in Science" evolved quickly into an "Adventure Thru Inner Space," which opened at Disneyland on 5 August 1967. The prime motivator of this expedition was Dr. Charles Allen of Monsanto.
Iago: Didn't he do the voice for the father on the Carousel of Progress?
Zazu: No, you twit, that was Rex Allen.
Iago: I thought Rex was the dog on the Carousel?
Zazu: The dog's name is Rover. Will you be still! I'm trying to talk about Adventure Thru Inner Space!
Now where was I? Oh yes.
Speaking of names, alternate titles considered for the attraction included "Micro-World" and "The Magic Microscope".
Iago: Hey! I bought my last hard drive at Micro-World!
Zazu: Shut up, you dodo, or I'll start a Countdown to Extinction!
Iago: Alright already, so talk!
Zazu: Thank you. Ahem. For those of our readers too young or underprivileged to have taken this adventure, it consists of using the "Mighty Microscope" to shrink you down to the size of crystals, then molecules, then atoms, and beyond.
Remember, this was decades before Prof. Wayne Szalinski decided to put his kids on a diet, and the reduction ratio was much greater in this earlier attraction.
One interesting note is that the Mighty Microscope stood in almost exactly the same spot as did the giant telescope when the building housed Kaiser's Hall of Aluminum Fame through July of 1960.
Iago: Wasn't that the joint that had a pig for a mascot?
Zazu: Very good Iago! Kap was indeed the "Kaiser Aluminum Pig" mascot of the Hall of Aluminum Fame. However did you remember that?
Iago: Well, that Hall was a real turkey, and since pork is the other white meat....
Zazu: Oh, go stuff yourself!
Iago: Stuffed pig? Hey, that could be tasty.
Zazu: Please ignore my associate. He has no functioning brain.
Narration for the attraction was supposedly the "suspended thought waves" of the first guest to travel through the Mighty Microscope. As with so many other Disneyland attractions, it was written by X. Atencio and recorded by Paul Frees.
Iago: I remember Paul. Didn't he get his start as the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
Zazu: Iago, why don't you flit over to the Space Bar and get yourself a snack, hmm?
Adventure Thru Inner Space is a landmark Disney attraction because it was the very first use of the Omnimover ride system, now widespread in the parks. This system has many names: Atomobiles in this first application, Doom Buggies at the Haunted Mansion, Time Machines at Spaceship Earth, and many more to come.
Omnimover systems consist of an endless chain of small vehicles, each with a thin blade extending from the bottom. Pairs of tires spotted along the track move the chain, much like the tires of the old PeopleMover propelled those vehicles. Omnimovers have the ability to rotate, and this is used to focus guests' attention on the scenes of interest (and distract them from the boring parts). Each vehicle also has its own soundtrack, with any number of sound cues triggered by certain points on the track so the sound will stay in fair sync even after one of those unmentionable stops.
Iago: Unmentionable is the word. Hubba hubba!!!
Zazu: Yes, that was one of the unfortunate side effects of this attraction. Being as it was free, the lines were short, and the story not terribly compelling, the sense of privacy offered by the Atomobiles encouraged quite a number of activities not generally considered to be appropriate at a Disney Park.
Iago: I remember now! My nickname for the ride was the "No-Tell Motel!"
Zazu: Yes, well it wasn't all that much "No-Tell" after Disney installed closed circuit TV cameras in the ride.
Iago: Do you mean....
Zazu: Yes I do. And if you don't behave yourself, I'll send the tapes to the "National Perspirer!"
Actually, the cameras weren't put in to serve the prurient interests of the cast members, but to help apprehend those miscreant guests who leaned out of their Atomobiles to touch, break, or remove the set pieces. It was quite a difficult problem for this attraction, and led Imagineering to develop the concept of the "Envelope of Protection."
Iago: Is that like the "Cone of Silence" from "Get Smart?"
Zazu: No, the Envelope of Protection actually works. While many, on hearing the term, may think it refers to the protection of the guests, it actually refers to the necessary distance between the guests and the set for the protection of the set. The application of the EoP dimensions to subsequent attraction designs has resulted in much reduced maintenance, albeit at the cost of somewhat less intimacy.
Iago: I thought the problem with this ride was too much intimacy?
Zazu: Will you get your mind out of the gutter?
Iago: I'm from Hollywood. I feel more comfortable here.
Zazu: 2 September 1985, was the last day the Mighty Microscope shrank a guest, and the romantic opportunities in the park haven't been the same since. While much of the Plexiglas and Lexan sets were trashed, the Mighty Microscope survived, and the sharp-eyed visitor to Star Tours might just be able to spot it during their trip.
Iago: I thought it was Dalmatians that were spotted?
Zazu: And as usual, with Iago's help, this topic has also gone to the dogs.
Don't you ever shut up, you twittering fool?
Iago: Naw, it isn't a good idea. If I stop talking, I don't wear out my teeth, and they're long enough now. You know, you're looking pretty long in the tooth yourself.
Zazu: Well, if being old means I can remember such extinct attractions as the Adventure Thru Inner Space, I suppose I'll be content with my maturity. Now, if I could only find content in yours....
The music selected to accompany this page is "It's a Small World" from the Disney attractions of the same name, written by the Sherman Brothers.