Zazu: That's the "Liberty Belle."
Iago: Boy am I exhausted. I need a vacation!
Zazu: Oh goodie, that means I get one too. Where are you going?
Iago: I was thinking of a cruise. I got all these brochures in the mail, then I started to rank them.
Zazu: How very organized of you! By what criteria did you rank them?
Iago: By price, of course! Here's the cheapest one, it's called the "Mark Twain."
Zazu: You mean Disney's riverboat? But that's only a 20 minute cruise!
Iago: Maybe that's why it's so cheap. Anyway, it docks right across the way from the Tiki Room. I could walk!
Zazu: I'm afraid the "Mark Twain" doesn't dock here at the Magic Kingdom, Iago. It never has.
Iago: WHAT?!? So what's that big sternwheeler that blows its silly whistle every half hour all day?
Zazu: That's the "Liberty Belle."
Iago: No, I've been to Liberty Square, and I don't think that big bell would even float....
Zazu: No, no, not the Liberty Bell! Buy a vowel, clueless, it's the "Liberty Belle." It's the newest riverboat on Disney's waterways, having been launched just two short years ago.
Iago: I may have hatched in the morning, but it wasn't this morning! That riverboat has been here for over 27 years, not 2.
Zazu: Well, parts of it have, but not all. You see, they overhauled an earlier boat, the "Richard F. Irvine," in 1996, stripping off everything except the hull, boiler, and engines, and constructing an all-new superstructure from aluminum and vinyl.
Iago: Aha! I knew that boat had been there since the Magic Kingdom opened!
Zazu: Oh no, that boat wasn't launched until 1973, two years after the park opened.
Iago: So how did people get around before that? Swim?
Zazu: No, not in that water. The park opened with a different boat.
Iago: I don't remember two boats. What happened to it?
Zazu: The records are a bit sketchy on that point. It was taken out of service in the fall of 1980. Rumor has it there was some sort of accident that caused it to sink while in drydock, but I haven't been able to confirm that. At any rate, it was named the "Admiral Joe Fowler."
Iago: The name was FOWLer? Now there's a name I could get behind!
Zazu: Yes, perhaps you could. It would certainly be safer to get behind the "Fowler" than the "Irvine." You see, the "Richard F. Irvine" was a sternwheeler, but the "Adm. Joe Fowler" was a sidewheeler.
Iago: Is that anything like a sidewinder?
Zazu: No, it had two paddlewheels, one on each side, instead of one big wheel in the rear. It was quite fetching, and looked quite a bit like the "Molly Brown."
Iago: "Molly Brown?" Wasn't she the one who was unsinkable?
Zazu: Very good, Iago! Miss Brown got that nickname from surviving the sinking of the Titanic, you know.
Iago: Yeah, yeah. I saw the movie, you don't have to tell me about her.
Zazu: Did the movie mention that she was born in Hannibal, Mo.? The same town as Samuel Clemens?
Iago: You gotta be kidding! What are the chances of that?
Zazu: Pretty good, actually. Hannibal was also the birthplace of Cliff Edwards, the original voice of Jiminy Cricket, so it seems to have been fertile ground.
Iago: Yeah, yeah, but what's Molly got to do with riverboats? Was she really that ugly?
Zazu: Iago, the "Molly Brown" is a riverboat who shares the "Rivers of the Far West" with the "Mark Twain" at Disneyland Paris. The Paris "Mark Twain" isn't as new as the "Liberty Belle," having been launched in 1992, but it's a nice ship. Is that the "Mark Twain" your cruise is on?
Iago: I doubt it. I hear you have to have shots to go overseas and I don't like being shot at.
Zazu: Then perhaps you're booked to sail on the "Mark Twain" at Tokyo Disneyland, launched in 1983?
Iago: Naw, I don't go anywhere they eat bait and call it dinner!
Zazu: Well then, there's only one other possibility: Your cruise is booked on the original "Mark Twain," which has been circling the Rivers of America at Disneyland since 1955.
Iago: That's the one! Is it a big boat?
Zazu: Well, it's no "Disney Magic," but it's not bad. It has a displacement of 150 tons, a length of 105 feet, and a draft of only 18 inches.
Iago: An 18-inch draft? Now that's what I call a beer!!!
Zazu: No, you twit, they haven't even served root beer aboard since the mid-1960s. "18-inch draft" means it only needs 18 inches of water to float. That's why riverboats of this design were so popular on the muddy Mississippi and other rivers with shallow water and shifting sandbars -- they could go almost anywhere.
Iago: Oh. Well how does the "Mark Twain" compare to the "Liberty Belle"? Is the Florida boat bigger?
Zazu: Yes, but possibly not in the way you might expect. The "Liberty Belle" has exactly the same weight, 150 tons, and only a little more length at 113 feet, but because it's made primarily of aluminum instead of wood, it can carry 450 passengers, while the "Mark Twain" is limited to 300.
Iago: Does the "Liberty Belle" serve an 18-inch draft too?
Zazu: No, the new boats are less authentic, but more stable. The hull of the "Liberty Belle" extends about 4 feet below the waterline. It's mostly storage for rope, fuel, and water.
Iago: Water?!? Why would a boat need to haul water?
Zazu: For the boilers, of course. Remember, these boats may not have their steering wheels connected to anything, but the paddlewheels actually move the boats, a steam engine turns those wheels, and steam engines need water.
Iago: Hello! Excuse me, but isn't this boat ENTIRELY SURROUNDED BY WATER?!?!? What's the problem, isn't river water good enough?
Zazu: Actually, no it isn't. The dark water systems at Disney Parks, including the Rivers of America, the Jungle Cruise, and the castle moat, are kept dark with green and brown dye so you can't see the tracks and equipment under water. Boiling dye doesn't work at all well, so the boats pack their own water.
Iago: Now I've heard everything! Special water, no beer, and what was that about the steering wheel not being connected?
Zazu: Yes, it's true. The riverboats (and the sailing ship "Columbia" at Disneyland) are all guided by tracks. Unlike Disney's submarines, they do float, but the steering is all for show. Of course, this means that guests can become a part of that show.
Iago: How do I do that?
Zazu: You simply ask the harbormaster or the captain if they have a berth for a river pilot as you board. If no other guest (or cast member trainee) asked first, you will be allowed up to the pilothouse, and asked to steer the ship and blow the whistle. Survivors get a very nice certificate of competency, too!
Iago: Oh great! Another perk for little kids. So what's the maximum age for this one?
Zazu: There isn't one, so long as you can climb the steps. Of course, cute children generally have the right-of-way here as elsewhere.
Iago: Great! I could get bumped by a two-year-old with a rubber ducky?
Zazu: It could be worse ... at least you don't have to wear that diaper and drool again.
Iago: Good point. Those things get itchy in the heat.
The music selected to accompany this page is "Born on the Bayou" by John Fogerty.
Here are some URLs to souces of information about Disney Riverboats, just in case you aren't willing to take our word for things. Please let us know if you find any more you think might help.